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We’re past the quarter mark of the NFL season, which means we have a good idea of the trajectory of most teams. So let’s celebrate the teams whose good vibes have evaporated after Week 5. Note that these aren’t necessarily the worst teams in the league (the Titans and Browns, for example, are terrible but are largely playing as expected) as much as the ones who have been most disappointing.
New York Jets (0-5)
The only winless team in the league, the Jets check all the misery boxes. There have been devastating losses, starting with Chris Boswell nailing a 60-yard game-winner for the Steelers in Week 1. And there have been blowouts like Sunday’s 37-22 defeat to the Cowboys, which was not nearly as close as the score suggests. The Jets’ supposed strength, their defense, became the first 0-5 unit with zero takeaways in NFL history. The Jets continue to shoot themselves in the foot with penalties, turnovers, poor offensive line play, lack of fourth-down execution and uninspired coaching. Somehow the Jets are getting worse by the week. If that wasn’t enough this has been going on for years: their playoff drought of 14 seasons is the longest in the NFL. And with one of the worst owners in the league, it could continue for years to come.
Misery rating: 9/10 – How long is Aaron Glenn’s leash?
Baltimore Ravens (1-4)
Sure, it’s easy to chalk up Baltimore’s loss to Houston on Sunday to Lamar Jackson’s absence. But 44-10 – the worst home loss in team history – is embarrassing and even a talent like Jackson isn’t going to tip the scales if his defense, which in fairness has been blighted by injury, is godawful. Even worse, the Ravens defense hardly put up a fight against the Texans. It was a field day for CJ Stroud, Nick Chubb, and company.
Still, Jackson will probably return in the next few weeks, they play in a relatively weak division and their remaining schedule is soft, so all hope is not lost. But given how sloppy the Ravens have performed with or without Jackson, the hope-o-meter close to empty.
Misery rating: 6/10 - The Steelers probably won’t run away with the division.
Cincinnati Bengals (2-3)
This one boils down to one moment: Joe Burrow’s season-ending injury in Week 2. Three weeks without Burrow has resulted in three losses. It’s almost painful to watch two of the league’s best receivers, Ja’Marr Chase and Tee Higgins, doing their thing with nothing to show for it. Chase hauled in two huge touchdowns and 110 yards on Sunday in a 37-24 defeat to one of the league’s best teams, the Detroit Lions. But Cincinnati’s offense did most of the damage once the result was beyond doubt. Meanwhile, Burrow’s backup, Jake Browning, while impressive in the fourth quarter against the Lions, has mostly been a disaster. His three interceptions on Sunday doomed the Bengals.
No franchise in football hinges on the health of one player like the Bengals do with Burrow. Optimistic fans will point to the fact that they will be a playoff contender when Burrow returns next season, if he can stay fit. But only five weeks into this season, the campaign looks all but over for Cincinnati.
Misery rating: 6/10 – Once again, Bengals fans are left to wonder at what could have been.
Las Vegas Raiders (1-4)
Free Maxx Crosby, who remains one of the only bright spots in a weird new era of Raiders misery. Sunday’s 40-6 blowout loss to the Indianapolis Colts was another demonstration of the disastrous pairing of Geno Smith and Pete Carroll in the desert. Smith has been a turnover machine, leading the league this season with nine interceptions. His two picks in Week 5 resulted in Indianapolis touchdowns. We’re not sure what Plan B is, but Plan A – being all in on Smith – is a very painful watch.
Misery rating: 7/10 – OC Chip Kelly needs to change course ASAP.
Wildcard alert! Philadelphia Eagles (4-1)
Yes, they’re the reigning Super Bowl champions. And yes, they have lost just twice in 22 games. But between AJ Brown and DeVonta Smith being disgruntled with their roles, fan complaints about their sluggish offense and the city’s continued skepticism about head coach Nick Sirianni, you’d think the Eagles were 0-5. Yes, Sunday’s collapse was concerning: the Eagles blew a 14-point lead to Denver in the fourth quarter thanks to five penalties, an offense that faded horribly, and a Vic Fangio defense that was pummeled and outsmarted by Sean Payton. Crazier things have happened. Still, they were on the end of some controversial calls and are tied for the best record in their conference. Where are the smiles?
Misery rating: 3/10 - The vibes may be off but the Eagles will reach the postseason again.
Honorable mention: Arizona Cardinals (2-3)
The Cardinals are mediocre rather than miserable, but their embarrassing 22-21 loss to the previously winless Titans was incompetent. A goalline fumble from Emari Demercado, who celebrated a 72-yard would be touchdown too soon, followed by a fumbled Cardinals interception that ended in a Titans touchdown did Arizona in. You couldn’t concoct this loss if you tried. Given that this, and their previous two losses, were on game-winning field goals, there can’t be much joy in Glendale these days. “I don’t really know what to think about that,” Kyler Murray said after the game. “I don’t even know. I really don’t even know. That’s ‘How to Lose a Game 101.’ I don’t know. It was crazy.”
Misery rating: 3/10 – Is Kyler Murray still the future?
MVP of the week
Rico Dowdle, running back, Carolina Panthers. Dowdle, filling in for the injured Chuba Hubbard, could do with a little more confidence. He told teammates this week he would rush for 180 yards against Miami. Instead, he rushed for 206 yards on 23 carries, tying him for the second-highest rushing total in franchise history. Bruising runs of 53 and 43 yards from Dowdle in the second half fueled Carolina’s 27-24 comeback win over Miami. Dowdle is now chomping at the bit to face his former team, the Dallas Cowboys, next week. “They got to buckle up. I think they know,” he told reporters.
Video of the week
Another week, another flurry of controversial calls. Yet this penalty on Saints defensive end Carl Granderson may take the cake for the worst roughing the passer call in NFL history. Roughing the passer has been often discussed since it was retooled in 2018 to protect quarterbacks more fully. Some fouls are legitimate acts of targeting, but defenders are sometimes flagged for simply landing on the quarterback, unable to alter their momentum. This play from Granderson on Giants quarterback Jaxson Dart didn’t even go that far. The errant call did not impact the outcome as the Saints topped the Giants 26-14, but not calling this a clean sack is ridiculous.
Stat of the week
Four. That’s the number of wins Daniel Jones has this year with the Colts, the same number he had in his last two years combined with the New York Giants.
Indiana Jones, the artist formerly known as Danny Dimes, continues to be one of the great stories of the young season. Through five games, Jones has thrown for 1,290 yards and six touchdowns and has rushed for three more. The Colts offense dominated the Raiders as Jones led a balanced attack en route to a 40-6 rout. It helps to have Jonathan Taylor and a solid offensive line but this is a very different Jones. He’s playing with confidence, his decision-making is sound, and he’s taking chances in tight windows. Jones, along with Mac Jones and Sam Darnold, are proof that before we label someone a bust, let’s consider their fit.
Elsewhere around the league
-- The Patriots may have a legitimate quarterback on their hands. Drake Maye led New England against the (then) unbeaten Buffalo Bills on Sunday night and came away with a victory. He was particularly impressive in the final minutes, with the teams tied at 20-20 and the Patriots driving for victory. One throw was reminiscent of Patrick Mahomes, as Maye fended off the 320lbs DaQuan Jones and completed a pass as he fell to the turf to Stefon Diggs, who finished with 146 receiving yards on his return to Buffalo. Moments later the Patriots had booted the game-winning field goal and Maye had the finest victory of his professional career. There should be many more to come.
-- Yes, Sunday’s win was over the 0-5 Jets, but Dak Prescott’s MVP bid is real. Over the past two games, without CeeDee Lamb and behind an offensive line filled with backups, Prescott has thrown for 556 yards, seven touchdowns and zero interceptions. Prescott was asked whether he heard M-V-P chants after Dallas’s 37-22 win over New York: “I mean, my ears work,” Prescott said, “so I heard it, but I didn’t hear it. It’s Week 5. I don’t care.”
-- It was a triumphant return from injury for Jayden Daniels who did enough to spark the Commanders to an impressive 27-10 road win over the Chargers. Daniels, playing with a knee brace, finished 15-for-26 with 231 yards and touchdown. He added 39 rushing yards on eight carries. The Commanders sacked had five sacks on Justin Herbert, whose offensive line did little to protect him. The Chargers also made some costly mistakes: fumbling when they had a 10-0 lead and looked to be driving for another score, and having a punt return touchdown called back for roughing the kicker.
-- This week’s How Is This Still Happening Award goes to Cardinals running back Emari Demercado. The mistake proved crucial as the Cardinals lost to the Titans 22-21.
-- Tua Tagovailoa had a nice statistical game against Carolina, throwing for 256 yards and three touchdowns, But it’s hard to win football games when you’re being sacked by your own center … not to mention allowing Carolina to erase a 17-point deficit. Yikes.
-- It was a fascinating day from Vikings Jordan Addison. Kevin O’Connell benched the wide receiver for the first quarter of Minnesota’s matchup against Cleveland in London for missing the team walkthrough. A couple of hours later it was Addison who hauled in Carson Wentz’s game-winning touchdown pass with 25 seconds left. After the 21-17 win, fellow Vikings receiver Justin Jefferson said he “had words” with Addison and vowed to make sure his teammate’s “head is on straight.”
-- The 49ers moved to 4-1 after an upset win 26-23 win over the Rams on Thursday, a testament to Kyle Shanahan’s coaching, given the team’s slew of injuries. Without Nick Bosa, Brock Purdy, George Kittle and so many others, the stagecoach turning into a pumpkin feels right around the corner. But a fairytale season is a real possibility as the rest of the 49ers’ schedule is packed with teams currently under .500.
