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1 week ago
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NO MERSEY
While assorted pundits and fans of both teams spent the aftermath of Sunday’s draw between Arsenal and Manchester City squabbling over which side had emerged as moral victors, the actual winners of the game were kicking back a couple of hundred miles away, basking in the warm glow of a Merseyside derby triumph that took them five points clear at the top after just five rounds of fixtures. Much has been made of the fact that Liverpool have yet to drop a point in their title defence “despite not playing well”, although anyone who actually watched the opening half-hour of their win over Everton on Saturday might beg to differ.
Against opponents who didn’t bother turning up for the first 30 minutes (but would later moan about only getting an additional 180 seconds in which to try to rescue a point), Arne Slot’s side were at their imperious best and scored two cracking goals despite their coach having left the two most expensive signings in the club’s history on the bench. As has become customary, albeit with no obvious detrimental effect beyond shredding scouse nerves, upon taking what should have been an unassailable lead, they promptly downed tools and allowed Everton back into the game. Knowing that Liverpool are never more vulnerable than when they are trying to protect a two-goal advantage, Everton overcame their early-game lethargy and pulled a goal back but were ultimately unable to make their second-half superiority count.
Everton’s star performer on and off the pitch was Jack Grealish, who did a passable impersonation of an irate fan on the blower to a rage-baiting radio football phone-in in a series of post-match interviews. Most of his ire was reserved for the match referee Darren England, whose decision to book Kiernan Dewsbury-Hall for taking a free-kick too quickly had left him baffled. “I’ve never seen a player in my whole life get booked for taking a quick free-kick,” he fumed. “I don’t know where that rule’s come from.” Grealish’s irritation was quickly seized upon by internet oddballs on various Social Media Disgraces, who incorrectly decided that England’s decision to book Everton’s midfield stately home was further proof of an as yet unexplained plot hatched by the Premier League’s refereeing fraternity to ensure that Liverpool win the title again.
Quite apart from the fact that Dewsbury-Hall’s booking had no discernible effect on the outcome of the game, what Grealish and most of these tinfoil titfer-wearing cranks don’t seem to have noticed is that young Kiernan had a few minutes previously been warned against taking quick free-kicks without either discreetly asking the referee’s permission or waiting for his whistle. He subsequently had his name taken for blatantly ignoring that warning, an offence that ticks the bookable box of “persistent offences”. So while anyone is well within their rights to question the match official’s jobsworth sensibilities, the widely held and totally misconceived notion that Dewsbury-Hall’s yellow card was unprecedented and came out of nowhere is demonstrably a complete load of cobblers. Still, if believing otherwise helps more paranoid Arsenal or Manchester City fans feel better about the carnival of cowardice at the Emirates, who are we to torpedo their conspiracy theory?
QUOTE OF THE DAY
Absolutely one of the best humans. Always available for a chat, one of the good guys. A champion in the women’s game and a top bloke … he was always smiling. Matt will leave a huge void in the women’s game. He was one of a kind, and his loss will be felt by all. My heart goes out to his family, but I want to take the time to acknowledge what a special man he really was” – Emma Hayes was one among many to pay tribute to Matt Beard, the former Liverpool head coach who won two WSL titles there, who has died aged 47.
LIVE ON BIG WEBSITE
Join Michael Butler from 7pm BST for live updates on the Ballon d’Or ceremony in Paris.
Surely the big question from this weekend is: could Pep drink a pint of wine?” – Tim Woods.
Ruben Amorim says that not even the Pope could change his ways. I’m sure even Pope Leo knows that 3-4-3 is an inflexible, exposing system. It won’t be long before white smoke comes out of the Stretford End” – Kev McCready.
If you have any, please send letters to [email protected]. Today’s winner of our letter o’ the day is … Tim Woods, who wins some Football Weekly merch. Terms and conditions for our competitions are here.
BALLON D’OR! BALLON D’OR! BALLON D’OR!
It’s Ballon d’Or day! Tonight in Paris – and Marseille – world football will celebrate itself and all who walk in it, with particular focus on the best men’s and women’s players across the globe between August 2024 and August 2025. After the self-perception of last year’s superflounce – that’ll teach Fifa to give a best player award to the best player! – the internet is aflame with rumours that Real Madrid will again spend the evening atop the moral high ground rather than at the official ceremony.
There will be plenty of Lionesses at the ceremony, though. Lucy Bronze, Hannah Hampton, Chloe Kelly, Alessia Russo and Leah Williamson are all on the shortlist, hoping to become the first England player to win the women’s award. Ballons d’Or are won on the pitch, which is exactly where Ousmane Dembélé – the strong favourite to win the men’s gong – will be for most of the ceremony.
Paris Saint-Germain have a rearranged Ligue 1 fixture in Marseille; the game was postponed on Sunday due to a rain and flood warning. By our admittedly fagpacketish calculations, the men’s winner will be announced around 45 minutes after the final whistle, so he may deliver the sweatiest acceptance speech in football history. In the past, Dembélé’s dodgy timekeeping was a symbol of his unfulfilled potential. Tonight, he’s not going to turn up at all. But he has a very good excuse.
NEWS, BITS AND BOBS
Noni Madueke could be on the Arsenal sidelines for a long spell after suffering knee-knack in the 1-1 draw with Manchester City.
Bernardo Silva is not happy! The midfield schemer has accused the fixture schedulers of lacking respect and common sense and claims Manchester City were at a physical disadvantage against Arsenal having played in Bigger Cup on Thursday night. “It is not fair to play one of these games like this,” he yelped. “It is just not right.”
Graham Potter, who became West Ham manager in January after agreeing a long-term vision with the club’s owners, can almost smell the P45 in the post.
David Cameron’s other club, Aston Villa, are also struggling. They scored their first goal of the season but still failed to beat a Sunderland team who had 10 men for an hour. “We have to recover our identity,” blathered Unai Emery. “We were lazy sometimes defensively.”
Yeovil manager Danny Webb has resigned after one game for family and personal reasons.
And José’s back, baby! On the weekend Pep Guardiola finally parked a bus in tribute to his old rival, Mourinho began his second spell as Benfica head coach with a dominant 3-0 winat AVS. After the game he cleared up any unfathomable misunderstandings by confirming he hadn’t returned to Portugal to “wage war” on Porto and Sporting. The Peaceful One is back!
STILL WANT MORE?
Our WSL review looks back at a sombre weekend when Matt Beard was remembered as an “incredible human”. And here’s Tom Garry’s lovely tribute to Beard.
Nicky Bandini on how Lorenzo Pellegrini’s strike to settle the Rome derby may have helped to heal his relationship with Roma’s ultras.
Ten talking points from the weekend’s Premier Leeague action. You know where to click.
Andoni Iraola is a model modern manager. Could he save Manchester United? Jonathan Wilson has 1,308 words of praise for Bournemouth’s smart and flexible head coach.
Borussia Mönchengladbach’s late rally could earn Eugen Polanski a chance to save their season, reports Andy Brassell.
Sid Lowe on Girona’s fall.
Time waits for no man – even Mikel Arteta, writes Barney Ronay.
And one for your bookmarks: our Premier League top scorers page is live, live, live! Though the race for the golden boot might be dead, dead, dead by Christmas if Erling Haaland keeps up his return to form.
MEMORY LANE
Igor Belanov leaps past Atlético Madrid’s Julio Prieto during Dynamo Kyiv’s 3-0 victory in the final of the European Cup Winners’ Cup in May 1986. Belanov went on to score four times for the USSR at Mexico 86, including a hat-trick in a 4-3 defeat by Belgium, and was a surprise winner of the Ballon d’Or in December 1986. Only European players were eligible, which ruled out Diego Maradona. Belanov pipped England’s Gary Lineker, who won the golden boot in Mexico, and Spain’s Emilio Butragueno.
