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Key events
On the screen at the back of the stage, the words “People make Glasgow” – and almost everywhere else, then a singer with whom I’m unfamiliar.
“St Lucia” begins Ger Nugent. “The only country named after a female?”
Cor-rect.
Well that was nice, and now we’ve three tour guides taking us back in time to the early days of the rag trade, then the famous shipyards – which spawned, among others, Alex Ferguson, followed by wind turbines.
Now we’re people-watching under the clock in Glasgow Central train station, a meeting point since the early part of the 20th century, with Nathan Evans and The Saint PHNX playing their hit Home.
Cheers greet its end, and now I’m steaming we’ve no sport to follow immediately. But instead, we’re getting a day in the life of Glesga and we see a mural of Scott McTominay scoring against Denmark with “Choose Scotland” on it; what a life that boy is living, can there be two better places to be a hero than Scotland and Naples?
And that completes the walk-in; now, we’ve the actor Sam Heughan searching Nessie. Surely, shirley, the orchestra razz out this classic.
Er no, but we do get Flower of Scotland, one of the best of its kind.
Cited for filming it, Hoy explains: “I’m still a fan at heart.” Six Olympic golds and this is where his heart is at, enjoying the joy of others; a mensch.
..and enter Scotland! Alex “Tattie“ Marshall, a bowler at his eighth Games, leads them out, and the noise level increases; for this athletes, it’s getting real.
Ah, but it’s Wales first, the hosts left till last…
In come Jersey, then Malta, which leaves us with … Northern Ireland, Scotland and Wales.
Next up it’s Gibraltar, then Guernsey, husband and wife bowlers, Ian and Alison Merrien, with the flag. Then Isle of Man, with Alfie Bezance, a para-powerlifter the youngest flag-bearer at 17.
And finally it’s Europe, starting with Cyprus, then England, the flag carried by bowler Sian Honnor with swimmer Luke Greenbank holding the baton. “I can’t explain the pride to know that you’re leading your team out and you’re ready to go into battle,” bravehearts Chris Hoy.
Tonga arrive, then Tuvalu, whose capital Funafuti is one I’ll never forget as it’s one I brought into school when a kid in my year said he’d learnt them all – he had – then Vanoatu complete the continent.
We had to do it…
Now come Samoa, who haka in front of the royal box, and Solomon Islands, whose blend of blue, yellow and green is a delight.
New Zealand are out waving ferns, then Niue, then Norfolk Island – an Australian territory 1600km north-east of Sydney measuring 8km x 5km.
Australia emerge in blazers – it seems impossible they won’t top the medals table – followed by a very chill-looking Cook Islands, their women wearing garlands on their heads, great stuff. Fiji are next, then Kiribati, an archipelago in the central Pacific, and Naoeru, the world’s third-smallest country now known by its indigenous name rather than Nauru.
Trivia time: what is unique about St Lucia? Trinidad & Tobago come next, then Turks & Caicos complete the Caribbean delegation, meaning it’s time for Oceania.
Grenada are followed by Jamaica, then it’s Montserrat, whose black tracky has bright orange and green stripes; I’m interested. Then it’s St Kitts & Nevis – I turned my blood to Ting while working there – then St Lucia, then St Vincent & The Grenadines.
Antigua and Barbuda precede Barbados, mourning the wonderful Garfield Sobers, also in varsity jackets but with lovely blue and yellow. British Virgin Islands are next, then Cayman and Dominca.
Singapore, who have to do without table tennis in this edition, arrive next, then Sri Lanka, and this is all making me very hungry; there’s some serious scran in the African and Asian Commonwealth, and we’ve not even got to Jamaica. But we’re close, Anguilla the first of the Caribbean contingent to enter.
Malaysia, shorn of its badminton banker, saunter in, and then it’s Maldives, eight-strong, before Pakistan, whose javeliner Arshad Nadeem, reigning champ and also Olympic champ, bears the flag.
On to Asia and Bangladesh – who, by the way, are coming to Lord’s for a Test match next summer. Brunei Darussalam come next, followed by India, hosts next time as Ahmedabad tries to prove itself equipped for the Olympics.
Falklands come next – they’re taking part in the bowls – then Guyana – in black armbands after last week’s ferry disaster, and the remote St Helena.
Sprinting hotbed Bahamas are in first and I do enjoy their cyan hoodies, BAHAMAS on the front in bright yellow. Then it’s Belize, Bermuda and Canada, whose swimimng sensation, Summer McIntosh, isn’t competing though we’re told she is.
Each nation are handing over a decorated baton to be planted in the Saltire garden, which is a nice thing, and now it’s time for the Americas.
South Africa are in rugby shirts, not sure about that one, then Tanzania in a coilarless tracky top. But get a load of Togo, yellow, green red and white vertical stripes, lovely stuff, before Uganda and Zambia complete the African contingent.
Now Rwanda, another of the newer members, followed by Seychelles, of whose flag I’m a big fan, then Sierra Leone, of whose royal blue hoodies they’ll be elated to know I approve.
Bucket hats, summer shirts and and shorts for Namibia, then Nigeira in that gorgeous shade of green.
How many words rhyme with Mozambique? Bob wanted to find out.
Gosh, Malawi have gone for red blazers and black trousers, not unlike my niece and nephew’s school uniform, quickly redeemed by Mauritius’ summer shirts.
Kenya are in bright red trackies, while Lesotho are into the spirit of things with tartan flat caps – though I’m not sure why the blue of their jackets doesn’t match the blue of their trooser.
Any excuse: in dance Ghana, so here’s a playlist of Ghanaian tunes.
First Botswana, then national dress from Cameroon and varsity jackets from Eswatini, formerly Swaziland, before a four athlete-strong delegation from recent joiners, Gabon.
Now, though, it’s time for the athletes, 74 nations’ worth, starting with those from Africa. I’m hoping for some banging trackies.
Anyhow, the royals sit with Andy Burnham, prime minister apparently, and it’s anthem time.
So much so, this was the second piece I ever wrote for the Guardian.
And here we go, Hoy leading the King and Queen out of the tardis and into a garden trimmed into a Saltire. If you’re asking me for my Scottish icon, though – and we’ll see plenty tonight – there’s only one.
Ah, it’s a Dr Who-themed thing, searching for the King and Queen at Balmoral.
It’s almost time, and here’s Chris Hoy introducing things with a skit. It’s great to see him enjoying hissel.
Admittedly I’ve been fasting since last evening – it’s what Jews call Tisha B’Av – but all this talk of Glasgow has me chaleshing for a deep fried Mars bar. A deep fried anything, really, I’m not fussy, but I’d take a Mars all day long.
It’s not just athletics, though. I’m really looking forward to the netball, which should be an Olympic sport but isn’t, and also the swimming. We’re missing Summer McIntosh, but we’ve got Chad le Clos, looking to break the Commonwealth medals record, and Mollie O’Callaghan – among others,
What a race that mile is going to be.
Those of us who grew up with Steve Cram and his three world records in 19 days love the mile.
I can’t wait for this race.
This is so cool.
We’ve had some bad news today: Katarina Johnson-Thompson has withdrawn from the Games with injury, while Dina Asher-Smith and Matt Hudson-Smith are also out. We were already missing Keely Hodgkinson, Oblique Seville, Letsile Tebogo, Collen Kebinatshipi and Julien Alfred.
Preamble
Few cities in the world boast an identity a well-defined as Glasgow, its character defined by a love of storytelling and celebration, kindness and aggression, wit and resilience, related with a glorious poetic profanity. And if, to that, we add an international sporting event in need of a boost, we have the perfect combination and the perfect tonic now we’re bereft of Wimbledon, World Cup and the golfing majors. You might not think we need this, but I promise you: we need this.
It wasn’t actually meant to be such. Originally, the Games were to take place in Victoria, Australia but, as costs spiralled, the state government pulled out, then so too did Gold Coast, Queensland, the initial replacement.
So it’s off to Glesga we go, for a scaled-back affair featuring 10 not 19 events, para sport and able-bodied sport fully integrated into an intense week-and-a-bit of sensation and nourishment, joy and despair – and it all begins roundabout now.
